Dialogue and Conflict Transformation Resources

In the Mountain States Mennonite Conference, we value healthy relationships of respect and care, sustained through a culture of dialogue and constructive approaches to conflict and change in congregational life. This page provides basic guidance and resources for congregations and ministry leaders to support congregational decision-making processes or address tensions around differences that may arise in congregational life.

Note: The resources on this page are not intended to address situations of misconduct or abuse. If a pastor or credentialed leader in Mountain States is harming those under their care (sexually or nonsexually), click here (Link will be available at a later date) to learn more and to file a misconduct report. For assistance, contact Conference Safety Liaison Alice M. Price (aliceprice1950@gmail.com) or Conference Minister Amy Zimbelman (amyz@mountainstatesmc.org). For misconduct or abuse by non-credentialed persons within a Conference setting or other special circumstances, see the Conference Minister Consultations section below.

Why might my congregation seek outside support?

Congregations generally have governance structures and processes in place to effectively address the differences and tensions typical of group life and decision-making. However, situations can arise for which outside support may be helpful for moving forward in a healthy way. This may include when congregations become “stuck” in more persistent conflict dynamics, impactful decisions are at hand, or life changes such as leadership transitions are underway. Outside support can range from leadership coaching and capacity-building to more in-depth assessment of a situation, help designing dialogue or decision-making processes, and/or on-site facilitation of agreed-upon processes. Even in lower-stress situations, outside facilitation can be helpful to free up congregational leaders to engage more directly in important conversations or decision-making meetings. Congregational leaders may be in touch with Conference Minister Amy Zimbelman for suggestions of potential resources who have a history of working within our Conference or other similar settings. These outside resources may be available remotely, on-site, or a combination of the two.

What types of processes might a congregation consider?

Trained consultants and facilitators can help a congregation assess the process(es) most suited to a particular need. Some typical processes that can be provided by outside resources are outlined below.

Mediation

Mediation is a conversation facilitated by a third party. While the term “mediation” may be used to describe any facilitated process, it is most typically used in relation to conflicts or differences that center on a small number of participants. A congregation might consider using an outside mediator when:

• interpersonal conflict within the congregation has not been successfully resolved by less formal efforts at direct or assisted dialogue

• interpersonal or inter-group tensions are impacting congregational programming, leadership and/or the overall quality of congregational life

• the individuals involved have agreed to use an outside mediator

• there is a relatively similar level of power among those involved, or

• more significant power differences are acknowledged and can be effectively balanced or addressed within the mediation context

• behaviors involving misconduct or abuse are not involved

Mediation can be an effective stand-alone process, and also a useful subset of a larger group intervention. See Group Consultation & Facilitation below.

Restorative Justice

Like Mediation, Restorative Justice involves a process facilitated by a third party, typically with a small number of impacted individuals. However, the focus of Restorative Justice is to address the impact of specific harms or offenses. Restorative Justice processes include a range of direct dialogue and circle formats designed to meet the identified needs of the participants, especially those who have been directly harmed. A Restorative Justice process may be appropriate when:

• the harm or offense has occurred within a Conference or congregational context

• the facilitator is specifically trained in Restorative Justice and trauma-informed best practices

• those causing the harm or offense have accepted responsibility for their actions and have a sincere desire to “make things right”

• those who have been harmed have specific needs they would like addressed through a restorative process

• the process is fully voluntary for all involved

• the focus is on accountability and repair

• the process does not replace or prevent other appropriate or mandated reporting of significant misconduct 

Group Consultation and Facilitation

When issues are affecting larger groups within the congregation or the system as a whole, an outside consultant can be useful to coach congregational leaders and help them assess the range and depth of interests and needs involved. From that assessment, appropriate processes can be designed to address the range of identified concerns. Engaging an outside facilitator or team to lead agreed-upon processes can be extremely helpful to manage group dynamics and decision-making in these larger group settings. Group consultation and/or facilitation may be appropriate when:

• a congregation facing a significant decision or change wants to lay the groundwork for consensus-building and healthy ways to move forward

• a congregation experiencing systemic tensions wants a clearer, more objective assessment of underlying dynamics and potential solutions

• a congregation holding important leadership team or congregation-wide meetings, strategic sessions, or structured dialogues around group concerns wants someone from outside to provide specific skill sets and/or free up key leaders from the facilitation role

Conference Minister Consultations

If you’re wondering about other difficult types of issues in your congregation, please reach out sooner rather than later to talk through it and receive confidential support and resources from Conference Minister Amy Zimbelman. This may include situations such as:

• a pastor or other leader being harmed by a congregant

• persistent unresolved church conflict or tensions

• unaddressed bullying, abuse, or boundary issues

• child safety practices or concerns

• incorporating a registered sex offender into community life

• any difficult or confusing dynamic that could benefit from additional clarity about appropriate next steps

A  ministry of Mountain States Mennonite Conference